bbcsherlockheadcanon:

Submitted by moriartysminormischiefs

criminal-boyfriends:

submitted by anonymous

I think we have a winner for the best question answered~ That’s a tough one really, there’s so many crimes I’ve committed, hmmm…

-I really enjoyed strapping people to bombs~ I think that has to be my top one really, watching them quiver and sob in pure terror as they waited for Sherly to work out the answer. That poor old woman though…boom~
-Setting fire to my house was rather satisfactory too, no one will know how much I enjoyed watching the inferno engulf both my parents and the memories encased in the foundations of the house.
-Torture, that’s always a classic. It’s so much fun dragging it out until they’re just pleading to die~
-Breaking in and entering, especially museums. Gives me a chance to put Sebastian into a tight-fitting suit for ‘precautionary reasons.’ That and it’s like a shopping store with all-you-can-take aisle’s full of pretty stuff~
-Aaaaaand….Pushing people off of buildings~ <3 

….Killed them when I was nineteen~ My reason? I had many reasons…Reasons which I keep locked up for a reason, so they’ll be no story-time tonight, kiddies~

• who cooks normally?:  Buwahaha, completely obvious this one~ Sebastian, always. Although Jim tends to try and make an effort, it usually ends up with the kitchen being destroyed or the resulting food being more dangerous than a bucket of cyanide.
  
• how often do they fight?: It wouldn’t be a normal day without at least one fight. They’re usually smallish bickers 65% of the time, the other percentage will cover physical, major and fights which has led one of the two sleeping elsewhere until the situation cooled off (although that one’s pretty rare, being every month or so- blame it on the meriod pfft)
  
• what do they do when they’re away from each other?: Jim rarely leaves out of the country or anywhere far without Sebastian by his side. But when Sebastian leaves for certain jobs or weekends off, they text as much as possible. Sebastian texts to make sure Jim’s looking after himself properly and Jim texts purely for the reason that he misses his snipers company- but would never admit that, he just complains how boring it is with an empty flat. Despite the sentimental feelings, both greatly miss each other, while apart and they always have welcome back crazy sex once reunited, ALWAYS.
  
• nicknames for each other?: Sebastian: Seb, Sebby, Bastian, Bas, Bassy, Tiger, Sexy, Love, Darling, Pet, Irish Prick, Prick, Sod, Bastard, Wanker, Idiot, Moran the Moron, Sweetie-pie…The list goes on until Jim ends up being terribly uncreative. 
  Jim: Kitten, Leprechaun, Irish Pixie Bastard (I’m sorry I love that one so much <3), Doll, Porcelain, Jimmy, Jimbo, Midget, Little-legs, Babe, Sexy, Wanker, Prick, Smart-arse, Little Fucker…God the list goes on and on again.
• who is more likely to pay for dinner?: Jim, he likes to flaunt the fact he can buy whatever expensive meal they go for. Although when it comes to the typical takeaway when they can’t be bothered, Seb’d usually be the one to make the effort to the door and shove the money at the delivery guy.
  
• who steals the covers at night?: Both; although it usually ends up with Jim giving up and curling up to Sebastian to annoy him with a forceful heavy breath and fidgety movements.
  
• what would they get each other for gifts?:Gifts are rather rare. Jim detests them for the ‘sentential value’ they usually hold, but arguing against that, Jim does buy presents on a regular basis- new guns mostly- leaving them hidden in Sebastian’s cupboard to find later. Sebastian finds it incredibly hard to buy such a man gifts, but whenever he finds something amusing or…useful, he’ll buy it and leave it for Jim to find later too. Both are completely comfortable with this unspoken agreement and continue to do so without a word spoken, unless needed. 
  
• who kissed who first?: Sebastian was the first, it was mainly to shut Jim up, but both knew initially why he done it, the sexual frustration between them both was getting unbearable and one of them had to make a move.
  
• who made the first move?: ^^^ Same as above really.
  
• who remembers things?: Depends what there is to remember really. work, jobs and clients is for Jim. Anything else, Sebastian usually remembers it for the both of them, reminding Jim when he’s not too engrossed with work or frustrated.
• who started the relationship?: Both really, there wasn’t a distinct declaration of what they were to start with. But once they started sleeping together and Sebastian actually moved in they slowly mingled into accepting the fact they’re in some form of relationship. The process took a good year and currently both would find it, challenging to answer honestly if they were in a relationship if anyone asked on the spot.
  
• who cusses more?: Sebastian. Swears like it’s a different language where every second word is fuck, shit or anything else…it’s even worse when he’s pissed. Jim tries to alter that, but so far nothing’s really changed.
  
• what would they do if the other one was hurt?: Physically hurt- Jim leaves Sebastian for minor wounds, he knows the ex-soldier is man enough to handle and patch himself up. Major wounds he’ll help, call a medic and all-round, be there for him, unless distracted. Sebastian on the other hand, pampers Jim like a child whenever he’s hurt, telling the man off for being reckless and risking his life while he patches him up. 
  Emotionally- When it gets bad… it usually gets very bad. Both are just as vulnerable as each other in their own ways and they both know that about one another. The best way they cope with the emotional hurt is to simply hold the other until the storm subsides, the usual tea and coffee after to calm both down until normality breaks through. 

criminal-boyfriends:

submitted by anonymous

221hannahbaker:

Anon: Ooh, tell us about Jim’s anxiety? Or is this a just Sebastian Q&A? (hah no, I’ll talk about that little Irish twat too <3 )

Jim was officially diagnosed with GAD (generalized anxiety disorder) when he was 27, but he’s had it all his life. He’s mostly fine day-to-day, but he’s developed a system to keeping calm and self-soothing (though don’t fucking call it that in front of him).

Things that stress him out:

• Being late/when people are late to something
• Anything unplanned
• When Sebastian leaves dishes in the sink or clothes on the floor
• Public transportation/large crowds 
• Anything that is out of his control

Things that help him stay calm:

• Keeping neat (clothes, hair, flat, etc)
• Walking into a dangerous situation in a suit (he’d have a panic attack if he wore his jeans to a meeting with a client) - the suit is a physical embodiment of calm and control
• Reciting the Fibonacci sequence in his head
• Finding the north star at night
• Running his fingers over the chain of Sebastian’s tags, if he’s in a situation that isn’t public
• Texting Sebastian about something completely inane (and the subsequent reply text)
• And if he’s lucky and Sebastian is around when he’s anxious, a back rub or a cuddle never fails to help

ridiculoussherlockheadcanons:

by asktomolly 

mormorheart:

taggianto:

lifecrystals asked: I’ll just keep sending these until you stop answering them. :D What’s the worst thing that’s ever happened to them (this could be either separately, or together) at the airport/on a plane?

They were in Abha Regional Airport in Saudi Arabia, waiting in the airport terminal to hop a small flight to Dubai after a week of negotiations with a handful of ammunition suppliers. Both exhausted and jetlagged, Jim had fallen asleep on Sebastian’s shoulder, and Sebastian had been absently stroking his hair while staring out into the bright Arabian sunlight through the windows of the terminal. They really should have known better.

A group of men passing by where they sat started shouting at them in Arabic. Sebastian didn’t know exactly what they were saying, but it didn’t take a genius to catch their meaning. After all, homosexuality is still punishable by death in Saudi Arabia.

Sebastian could see where this was headed and tried to wake Jim up so could reach for his knife, but he wasn’t fast enough. Two men got their arms around Sebastian while a third pulled Jim off of him and threw him to the ground. Jim wasn’t even fully awake when the first kick cracked two of his ribs. Jim tried to scramble and get up but a second man joined in the attack and all he could do was curl into a ball and try to protect his body as best he could. 

Sebastian was shouting every obscenity and murderous threat in the book, vision clouded by anger, trying his hardest to shake his captors but the men were big and using their combined strength against him. He just needed to get to Jim, just needed to protect him, needed to kill these fuckers in the most agonizing way possible. He could see Jim’s face through his arms as he was trying to shield himself from the attack, and he was coughing, coughing up blood, and fuck if he could just reach his knife.

The other travelers in the terminal were either shamefully ignoring the attack, hurrying past with downcast eyes or jeering and shouting along their encouragement of the assault. Sebastian finally managed to free one of his arms and was reaching down for the knife in his boot when an airport security officer sauntered over. He said something which had the group of men laughing. Sebastian recognized the tone of “okay boys, you’ve had your fun, now I’ve got to tell you to stop and move it along, sorry, it’s only my job,” and with one final kick to the still figure on the ground, the men released Sebastian and walked off down the terminal.

As much as he wanted to flay each and every one of them alive, Jim was his priority now and he was immediately by his side, assessing the damage. Several cracked and broken ribs, possibly broken arm, thankfully no major damage to his neck or face aside from a large blossoming bruise that was threatening to swell his left eye shut.

The crew of their small private plane was sympathetic and helped Sebastian to get Jim into the cabin and lying back on a fully reclined chair. Jim was fading in and out of consciousness, and Sebastian did his best to attend to what wounds he could with the limited first aid kit on the plane. When they landed in Dubai, Jim was immediately rushed to the nearest hospital, staying for three days while Sebastian posed as his brother in order to not be forced to leave the room or suffer another attack.

When they finally got back to Britain, Sebastian immediately set up the sparring area in their basement. It was a month or two before Jim was fully healed, but once he was, Sebastian started training him in basic self defense. 

Since then, Jim has always been apprehensive in airports, though he does his best to hide this from Sebastian.

…..ouch, jesus